true, true, true heart! ;-)
* unless you go to a supermarket in Germany today.
There you will find nothing but war, violence, pain and destruction.
Supermarkets in Germany are pretty calm. Exception made for days that precede holidays.
All supermarkets will close tomorrow and remain that way until Monday morning.
So what do all the Germans do?
They go to the supermarket today and buy enough food for the whole winter (during war times). Really.
They get crazy. You see families buying large amounts of bananas and think “do they have an ape farm at home?”
If you go to the supermarket today between 6 P.M. and 10 P.M. you will see a lot of stressed people armed to their teeth with desperation and blood in their eyes.
You might see a couple of decent old ladies fighting for the last bananas or the last pack of fresh orange juice.
I’m a cool person, but I’m not stupid, so I have already gone to the supermarket. I have all the apples, bananas, bread and orange juice I need until Monday. But I might go there once again later today in order to buy some water and champagne. And tomato sauce. And a huge Durex lube that works for both massage and penetration.
My criticism is the following: people could be just a little cooler. No stress, guys. Nobody is gonna starve to death on the next 4 days. This is Europe, this ain’t the Third World. Over there people won’t do this either since they starve do death every single day of the year. Think about it when you’re chewing your fat piece of turkey.
Anyway, if somebody loses the chance to buy food at the groceries’ store, there are still thousands of kebap houses in the city. One might substitute the turkey for a € 2,50 half-chicken with fries. Don’t worry. God save the Muslims.
And so this is Christmas. And what have you done?
War is over. If you want it.
Share the fucking bananas.
